H I A T U S

"Welcome Back!" He claps his self on his shoulder, a difficult gesture that ultimately ends with him in a twisted knot on the floor with bruised knees.

In good fashion, I haven't slept all night. One p.m. is the twenty-four hour mark, and I have work at four. And how have you been?

As he cleans out the coffee pot in preparation for the next four hours of work, he considers everything he MUST set out to do. Write. No, that's not important. So he'll probably do that first. What is important? They agreed, over the weekend, about his agenda. A haircut. A job application. Life needs to move forward. That night at the chain, and each subsequent one, has been nothing but a string of one-man battles against Hell's brigade with neither side giving in. But, one side is relentless, tireless. He's not on that side.

Why all this debt, you might ask? Perhaps that because he's allowed himself to lay down in a muddy rut and let each passing shit-cart tread over him. They don't get bogged down, only push him deeper into the muck, and he doesn't wade up onto his knees or find some unfirm footing that lets him stand up, and doesn't politely ask the burden-bearer to kindly go around, no: And if he keeps this up, the mud gets deeper. Or, he can dig into it and pile it all up around him, so that the driver can't go through; and then, the mud will dry in a castle-cake around him, but finally he'll be able to burst through it, a butterfly out of metamorphosis, and he'll be stronger, and beautiful, and ready to fly.

A haircut, which I was going to walk into, but I'm trying to schedule instead. That's step one. Step two: call the office. Or maybe you want a shower first. Write these all down, mind you. Step three: a new email, step four the business online. Step five, the application, step six the phone call. It's your plan for the next three days. IN THREE DAYS, it will be done, all of it. No excuses this time, not when your life is finally yours and completely on the line.

He did so much to show you you're worth it. Don't disappoint him. It's finally your time to shine.

He told me to make lists, one for the next week, one for the next year. In one year, I hope I have a visitor here.