i suppose you could say the world's oldest man dies every day.

i scan wikipedia's obituaries frequently, to see if anyone important has died. to be honest, i'm looking for niches that have drained away and opened up. for example, ed mcmahon, a television personality, passed a few days ago. his tonight show catchprase was legendary. he died broke, owing hundreds of thousands on a $4.8 million mortgage. i'm going to be an adult someday but this man was a cultural fixture and right now I'd like to think, I'm smugly thinking, that i'll make it through life without this much debt. godwilling. but now i'm not really sure how I can relate this nasty little hope of mine to empty niches, because mr. mcmahon's example seems singular and unrepeatable while I type away insignificantly at something no one will ever read.

changing the subject...
supercentenarians die frequently. on wikipedia, the world's oldest living man usually shows up every couple of days. they seem to unconciously emphasize the living requirement. I've never seen any article about the world's oldest dead man, but scientists probably argue about him a lot. also, i'm nibbling on Oxalfixation Mints (www.oralfix.com), which are fruity little mints in a fruity fuschia tin, probably designed by the guys at Apple. they are curious mints. the back of the tin has simple instructions for procuring one from within, consequently reminding the fixated to, "push to please." the innuendo is probably more satisfying than the mints, but many women I know would probably confirm this is one of the more discouraging advantages of a nice package.